Quicksand

oh my goodness
i am slipping under
every false move has me packing my bags again
it is such a fucking nightmare to me
that if i am really honest
i have been mentally packing my bags
since the very beginning
and now i finally hit a point that
i need to be sedated
to withstand it
can't figure out if he just showed up
when i was already slipping away
just doomed
or if he is part of this quicksand?
i can't believe this
my child just a baby
and i want another
even though i feel like it is just
little him who keeps me here at all

pack it up.